He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
