so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
