THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
