This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
