Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
