Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
