walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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