We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
