wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
