its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize