i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
