We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
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