How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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