Sponge bath it is.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
