How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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