it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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