how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Randomize
