idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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