I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize