The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
