we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
