im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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