He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
