He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
