I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
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