i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
