and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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