sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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