If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Randomize
