Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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