(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I party with great urgency now.
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