I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
