Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
