FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
