I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
