She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
