Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize