Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
