in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
