so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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