singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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