Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
