i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize
