Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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