found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
When did angry sex become our thing?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
you made out with another girl for some wings
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize