i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
