Porn is love you can see.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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