we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
