there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize