the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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